Jane Green
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The summer of over-indulgence

October 3rd, 2016

Jane Green coffeeIt has been the summer of over-indulgence, and although I am perfectly happy floating around in diaphanous flowing tents and kaftans, Autumn is coming which means my jeans are eyeing me nervously from their position in the corner of my closet. I am pretending I don’t see them, as I pull on yet another elastic-waisted skirt, and slip my feet into flip flops.

But there is a definite chill in the air, which means I must make some changes. All those terrible things I do not eat because they are damaging and destructive to my various auto-immune diseases, not to mention puffing me up like a balloon? You know, those things like sugar, and bread, and pasta, and more sugar (that I have been eating all summer)? I am going to stop eating them now.

I did stop properly four weeks ago. I had been feeling so ill, that I didn’t have much choice. I did a two-week nothing-but-fruits, vegetables, nuts, seeds and beans cleanse, which felt wonderful, until I started to get dizzy spells, one in the middle of presenting an awards ceremony, which made me think it was perhaps time to re-introduce some fish.

I’m now back on the meat and fish, still off the sugar, the refined carbs, the dairy and the alcohol, and, for perhaps the first time in my life, the coffee. Whenever I have done cleanses before, I have always kept my coffee, reasoning that because I take it black with no sugar, how much harm could it possibly be doing. Also, my God, one has to have something to look forward to.

This time, I decided to take no prisoners, so coffee went out with the rest of it, and reader, I have to tell you that it has been three weeks, and I feel…terrible. I know. It’s not what you expected to hear. It’s not what I expected to feel. I thought by now I would have got over the withdrawal to find myself bouncing out of bed in the mornings, filled with energy and new-found joy at the day ahead.

Instead, I am only just getting through each day, crawling with exhaustion. I wake up feeling as if I have taken three sleeping pills. I have to cancel all afternoon plans because the only thing I’m good for is a two-hour afternoon nap. I can’t go anywhere at night because by about 8:30pm I’m toast.

I have been very very tempted to fall back into old habits and grab a cup of coffee or ten to get me through the day, but I’m determined to quit. Wish me luck. And if you don’t know where I am, try my bed.

(This article was first published in The Lady Magazine.)

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