The dangers of success

Yesterday I had lunch with the Eskimo, and sitting in our canteen were two of my oldest and dearest friends. They live on the other side of town, and I don't get to see them nearly as often as I would like, so for a while, the four of us sat together and caught up.

One of them is the Volunteer. The reason I never see her anymore is because she's turned into a crazy woman, volunteering for everything on the planet. I, being lazy, will never understand people who do this. (The Volunteer is a little bit crazy. I have known her drive her Smalls hours to farmer's markets in search of the perfect tomato).

Someone mentioned that a children's author had been to their school recently to give a talk. I will not name names, but if you have small children and you are reading a book to them about a small feathered flying thing, many of which can be found in Trafalgar Square, who steals a public transportation object (wheels, driver, that kind of thing), despite the reader's objections, you'll know who I'm talking about.

'I love those books!' we all clamored.

'What's he like?' someone asked.

'Well,' we were told. 'He was being filmed for something, so while the cameras were on he was great. Warm, funny, and fantastic with the children. But when the cameras were off he was a total diva who was completely full of himself.'

This, by the way, was from the most down-to-earth girl in the world. Someone who gets on with absolutely everyone, who has no airs and graces whatsoever. So for her to say it, I believe it.

I would like to say three things.

The first is that everyone has bad days. I try and live my life in a way where I am never rude, always respectful, very much treating others how I would like to be treated. I don't demand, I ask.

But, run across me during a certain couple of days every month, or when I'm stressed and anxious, and it is Jekyll and Hyde.

I have read horror stories about people I know well, celebrities in some instances, who I have only ever known to be kind, gracious, extraordinarily generous, and I have been amazed that others have seen them as rude, arrogant, dismissive.

We all have bad days.

The second is that I presumed the author was suffering from what I call 'First Novel Syndrome.' This is when your first novel shoots onto the bestseller list, and you suddenly believe all the hype. You think you are just as wonderful as everyone says, and your head, and ego, grow larger and larger. I remember it firsthand, but ten books in, thankfully, it doesn't last. Again, I had heard horror stories about authors whose books were HUGE, and I knew they were suffering FNS. I have met a few of these authors over the years, and met them a few books later, and every single one of them comes back to earth after the next books don't garner quite the same amount of attention.

So I went to the children's author's website, presuming he was a newbie. It seems that although he is relatively new, he has won a ton of awards. So my theory may be correct.

The third is this. However big, important or successful you think you are, there will always be someone bigger, more important, and more successful than you.

Asking for a specific type of soda to be at a talk at a school, is faintly ridiculous. You are not Madonna.

Be very careful how you treat people on the way up, And if you think you're at the top, and you're staying there, there will be a journey down. There always is.

And arrogance, rudeness, a lack of humility, is not the recipe for a smooth ride down. Humility can make the journey one hell of a lot smoother.

Me? I just hope he was having a bad day.